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December 1999
A Cowboyís View of Canine Wisdom

If your dog is fat, you arenít getting enough exercise.

Whoever said you canít buy happiness forgot about puppies.

In dog years, Iím dead.

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.

People who keep dogs are cowards who havenít got the guts to bite people themselves.

Ever consider what dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul -- chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. Thatís almost $7.00 in dog money.

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.

Donít accept your dogís admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

In order to keep a true perspective of oneís importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him.

There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face.

When a manís best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem.

Catís motto: No matter what youíve done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it.

Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it wonít buy the wag of his tail.

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.

He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.

Things that upset a terrier may pass virtually unnoticed by a Great Dane.

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